Wednesday 8 August 2012

Love Of My Life

To my dearest Jessie,

I know that technically, I saved your life once, long ago, when we first met. But ever since then, I feel like you have saved mine countless times. Perhaps not physically, but emotionally. You have been with me as long as I have been an adult and although I feel like I have already abandoned you, I can't bear the thought of not being greeted by you ever again.
The true meaning of friendship
You brought so many smiles to my face, especially at the times I really needed them. You comforted me always whenever I needed to be comforted. You were a true companion and I know I will always treasure the memories I have of you.

Always on the lookout for the best spot
Of you being able to make my heart melt when I first met you. Of you, somehow, at 5kg, overpowering anyone who tried to hold you still on a car journey. Of tiny you, who could produce enough hair on furniture, clothes and the carpet to keep the Eskimos warm. Of you, who used to wake up from the deepest sleep as soon as I opened the door to the garden, just so you could come outside with me. Of you, who would trot back and forth, side to side around my bed, asking to be let up, night after night. Of you, chasing insects in the garden and ending up with a nose covered in dirt. Of you, who in the middle of summer would wake me up with a scratch on the bed or a lick because you wanted to go for a walk.
Always finding the best spot
Of you, who in the depths of the Canberra winter, I would wake up with a soft pat to go for a walk in the darkness. Of you, who got countless hours of entertainment from barking at and eating water from the top step of the swimming pool - despite how much it annoyed everyone. Of you, who chased and barked at the lawnmower when I was mowing the lawn. Of you, who squirmed like crazy when I bathed you but seemed so greatful to me afterwards when you got to lie in front of the radiator. Of you, who always listened to me and never judged. Of you, who got me to enjoy nature more, if only by watching you love life so much when you were amongst the smells of the bush and the flow of water. Of you, who knew the true value of investment by finding a good spot in the garden to bury a bone, protect it with your life, and then dig it up days later when it would be so much more disgusting to eat.
You always kept yourself, and your family, entertained


Most importantly, I will remember you, the friend who truly showed me the meaning of unconditional love.

I have slightly paraphrased what is, as you well know, one of my favourite songs of all time. Love of My Life, by Queen. I know it was meant to apply to a different situation, but it will always remind me of you.


Love of my life, you've hurt me
You've taken my heart, and now you leave me
Love of my life can't you see
Bring it back, bring it back
Don't take it away from me, because you don't know -
What it means to me

Love of my life, don't leave me
You've taken my love (all of my love) and now desert me
Love of my life can't you see (please bring it)
Bring it back, bring it back
Don't take it away from me, because you don't know -
What it means to me



You will remember, When this is blown over

And everything's all by the way
When I grow older
I wish I was there at your side to remind you
How I still love you - I still love you

 Back - hurry back
Please bring it back home to me
Because you don't know what it means to me -
Love of my life
Love of my life


Your safta sent this to me. It is comforting, but I don't know how I can ever be sure whether us humans say things like this just to make ourselves feel better. I truly hope not.

If It Should Be (author unknown)


If it should be that I grow frail and weak,
And pain should keep me from my sleep,

Then you must do what must be done,
For this last battle can’t be won.
 
You will be sad – I understand,
Don’t let your grief then stay in your hand,
For this day more than the rest,
Your love and friendship stand the test.


We’ve had so many happy years,

What is to come – can have no fears.
You’d not want me to suffer so,
When the time comes, please let me go.




Take me where my needs they’ll tend,
Only stay with me until the end.
And hold me firm and speak to me,
Until my eyes no longer see.
 
I know in time you will see.
It is a kindness you do to me,
Although my tail it’s last has waved,
From pain and suffering I’ve been saved.


Don’t grieve that it should be you
Who has to decide this thing to do.
We’ve been so close we two these years,
Don’t let your heart hold any tears.


So I am glad, not that she's gone 
But that this earth she roamed and lived upon 
Was my earth, too, that I had closely known  
And loved her and that my love I'd shown.

Tears over her departure? 
Nay - a smile 
That I had walked with her a little while.





You will always be in my heart.
Kevin

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