Dear Denmark

Dear Denmark,

It is time to be 100% open with you - I'm not sure this relationship is for life. That's the short, blunt, story. The long story though, is that I have not given up yet, and I want you to understand what might happen and why...

There is this other country which I fell in love with many years ago. I fear I may need to return at some point. Whilst I have a fantastic life with you, I barely have a worry in the world, I don't work too much, I enjoy life and you treat me well, something small is still missing. The feeling of you being my home. Israel, on the other hand, gives me this. If I do leave you for Israel it won't be easy (for me of course, I'm sure you really couldn't care less!) as it will be a big move into the relatively unknown (yet still known, in many senses). I won't know where I will live. I won't know what job I will have or how I will get one. I won't know how much I will earn and what my standard of living will be like. I won't know how long it will last. I won't know many things. Most importantly, I won't know if I will really be happy.

Some things I do know though. I know it will be hard. I know it will take me a while to get fully comfortable in the language again, which really isn't saying too much given how uncomfortable I am with your language. I know that when I speak the language badly, locals will work with me, and not just switch to English. I know I will earn less money than you offer me here. I know that I will be away from the allergen free safe-haven you have provided me and right in the middle of a non-stop hay-fever and asthma cycle. I know that I will no longer have frozen winters, but will instead have humid, sweaty summers. I know that I will have family and friends nearby. I know that I will feel at home. I know I will feel proud.

As you well know, I am not good at making decisions. It is usually the flip of a coin, a chance encounter, or something exciting landing in my lap which helps me decide my path. You also well know that through my eyes, the grass is always greener on the other side. As one would expect, these two qualities do not go well together. At some point though, one has to find the greenest possible grass, and although it sure is green here, perhaps it is slightly greener over there...

My engineering brain needs a structured decision making process. A deadline and a logic statement. My deadline is Rosh Hashana 5773, and unless something particularly amazing happens to me by then - perhaps an exciting turn of events on the job-front, or falling in love with someone (who also falls in love with me), we will have to part and go our separate ways.

There. I said it. Now lets get on with making the most of things. It ain't over until the fat lady sings!

With all my admiration and respect,
Kevin